FUCKING FUCKING FUCKING F.

Every time I talk to D, he's doing something with F.  Every goddamn time!  Last night, I was talking to him on Skype at 1 am his time and he suddenly had to go take F home.  What the FUCK is she doing at his house on a Sunday night at 1 am?  Today, he's "bouncing ideas off F".  WHY are they always together??  As far as I can tell, he doesn't even fucking hang out with anyone else anymore.

I mean, I guess at least he's comfortable with telling me he's doing shit with her?  Not really a sign of a guilty conscience there.  I don't know; sometimes I suspect that he's purposefully mentioning her to gauge my reaction.  But D isn't that sneaky.  D is honest and upfront.  So that can't be right.  I'm being very careful about not reacting though.  I just ignore it.

I'm so FRUSTRATED right now.  And I feel helpless--there is NOTHING I can do about this whole situation.  The only thing I can control is my reaction, I know that, but FUCK.  I fucking HATE this.

D is mine mine MINE and I don't want to share.