Oh dear god.  So.  Latest mini-drama in my ridiculous life:

I participated in a psych study at my university last semester.  I had to do a "journal" entry each week--basically just answer all the questions they sent me and send it back.  And I got paid for it.  Easy, right?  I thought so.

Turns out, I was part of D's control group for his thesis project (YES THE SAME D THAT I AM DATING).  So guess who has to read every single one of these journal entries?  Right.  D. 

I was trying to write, for the sake of the study, like no one would actually read any of it--I knew that someone would, of course, but I assumed it would be the prof in charge of the study (whom I have never met nor ever plan to meet).  NOT D.


I really can't recall what all I wrote.  I'm positive that there's nothing about ed in there...there might have been one question once asking about body image?

I know for a fact that there are at least a few things about D in there, because we started dating just after I started journalling.

I found this out yesterday--D came in and told me, "Now that the study's over, I can tell you that you were in my control group!"  He thinks it's hilarious.  HE HAS KNOWN ABOUT THIS ALMOST SINCE THE BEGINNING.  (though he did say that he didn't realize it until a bit later...meaning that he really couldn't have done anything about it at that point)

I am a psych minor, so I know how these studies work, and all the procedures etc.  I understand why he couldn't tell me.  I understand why he has to read and score my journal.  I know that I promised to be 100% honest with him at all times (though in the case of ed, I'm still operating on "don't ask, don't tell" and will be for the foreseeable future), and so it shouldn't really matter if he reads it or not.

But still.