Procrastinating still.

The housemates return today.  The apartment has been cold and silent in their absence.  Serene.

She is visiting this week.  Not sure exactly when.  Not to see me, of course--never that!  The thought is laughable at best.  We were never really friends anyway.  She was always his friend first and foremost. 

I am not sure whether I hope I see her or I hope I don't.  I am not thin enough to see her yet.

If she does see me, I want her to see me with D.  I want to look amazing.  I want her to see that I am happy now, without him.  I want her to be jealous.  I want her to eat her words (childish, self-centered, all your fault, everything, it's all your fault).

Not sure if this makes me a bad person.  But you know what?  Right now, I really don't fucking care.