Computer is back, yay!  The idiots wiped my hard drive for a simple hardware problem so I've had to spend all day restructuring it.  But I HAVE COMPUTER AND INTERNET AND I CAN WORK AGAIN so all is well with the world.

Actually, it worked out well that I didn't have my computer while D was here.  He didn't bring his either (OR any schoolwork, which was really surprising as he is a total workaholic).  So we couldn't watch movies or anything together, but I wasn't tempted to work at all while he was here!  Pretty much he is amazing and wonderful and I wish he were still here.  And that is all I shall say about that.

Had another meeting with new therapist and she continues to make good impressions on me.  I feel more comfortable with her than I did with Dr. Therapist.  We are having once weekly meeting for now.  I made her give me homework last time...I told her she was not being pro-active enough (I am an impatient client).  The homework is to stop what I am doing here and there and just figure out how I feel.  Because I have difficulty understanding my own emotions sometimes.  She says she does not like the words "should" and "shouldn't" and that she will not tell me what to do or how to do it.  She says my food plan seems to be working well for me right now, that while it may not be fully sustainable in the long run, it is a good start.  She says I seem to be very adaptable and she thinks that is a strength.

Food is going well, I have to admit.  Actually, I have to brag.  Food has been going awesomely.  I have not binged since...before last time I posted.  Approximately 2.5 weeks.  That is really good for me!  I have eaten 3 meals per day every day.  I'm not hitting 1000 cals every day, but I'm usually closer to it than before (when I was under 300 cals/day).  The cereal is still in the cupboard and it is not stressing me out.

I'm not saying I haven't had bad days.  I have.  I felt stressed and bingey yesterday.  I freaked out once while D was here and almost couldn't eat lunch.  I felt like I ate too much almost every meal that D was here because we went out to eat a lot (and you know how scary restaurants are).  I started binging when I got back from dinner with Uncle J...BUT I STOPPED.  Let me pause so that can impact you.

I STOPPED A BINGE.

That's why I am not counting it as a binge.  I will not count that as a failure because that is a HUGE success.

Anyway.  That's what's been going on here.  Now I need to go do my laundry.

Missed you all, love you all, hope you are being happy and safe.  <3