The verdict is that D feels he is incapable of enduring long-distance any longer.

He said he still loves me.  We spent Wednesday and Thursday talking over options.

We are taking a break and re-evaluating in June, when I go home to visit my father after his surgery (exact date unknown as of yet).

I will see D at S's wedding in exactly 4 weeks.  We are going as friends only.  And then he is driving me to my best friend's art show, which is approximately a 4 hour car trip.  That should be interesting.

Exactly 1 year and 5 months.  To the day.  I wonder if he realized that?  I didn't until after the conversation was over.

I don't know how I am feeling.

A strange thing: my FB change from "in a relationship" to "single" garnered sympathy, virtual hugs, "I love you"s from 12 people.  D has had no comments on his.  I don't know how I feel about this.  The thought crossed my mind that maybe I should be offended that people automatically think that I am the one dumped, the one jilted, the one to be pitied.  Then I realized that was silly and a product of my irrational fear of being perceived as needy and dependent.  Now I just feel touched that so many people care.  But I wish D had some supportive comments on his status change.  I know this is hard on him as well.

Within 20 minutes of it going up on FB I got 2 phone calls.  M&J called almost immediately and LG called right after them.  Making sure I was okay.  That's sweet of them.  H called later and chastised me for not telling her what was going on.  Thanks, H, that's so helpful.  She was annoyed that she had to find out via FB.  She also told me that D was "dragging me down" and that this was for the best, which was really not what I needed to hear.  But I suppose she means well.  B called that night to make sure I was doing okay as well.

People care about me.

My undergrad advisor's wife FB messaged me the next morning: "Do you have a place to stay in X?  We are going to the wedding too.  Let us know when you will arrive so that we can have you stay with us."  It made me cry.

I've cried a lot lately.

I find that I am unable to put most of this into words.